Walking in other people's shoes

I guess you have to personally experience some things to really understand them.

I’ve worked with military families for almost three years now, mostly the moms and dads, married couples, a few teenagers here and there. I’ve heard horrible stories of overburdened spouses, the financial problems, the infidelity, the worry, the stress, the fear, the loss. For a long time now I’ve known that the life of the OEF/OIF military spouse is no party. The longer I work in military mental health the more I realize that the family that is left behind by the soldier is frequently overlooked and under-serviced, even though they may be just as stressed (albeit in different ways) as the deployed member. I’ve known this, but haven’t felt it.
I think a lot about my family and I’ve recently felt guilty about putting my kids through this deployment. They didn’t agree to it, they don’t want it, and they don’t understand it. When I leave, all the parenting and household responsibilities fall upon Colleen, and she has to take care of herself in the middle of all that… when all I have to take care of is myself and my job. All I’m saying is that the families need as much support, attention and accolades as the deployer…

Colleen is down sick this week and yet the demands of the day don’t stop. I may as well be a million miles away. I feel helpless… I’m starting to personally feel it and understand it.